Just A Little Unwell

I'm not crazy, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not. Yeah right. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom. I'm afraid AF is going to be there waiting for me. I spent most of the night have the regular odd random cramps that while they don't necessarily feel like AF cramps, I still thought for sure AF was on her way. Never did show but I sure thought she was going to. I also have felt kind of queasy since last night but have been trying really hard to convince myself it's all in my head or that it's nerves from being afraid of going to the bathroom. I just don't think I can handle getting my hopes up that high if they might fall down again. I'm now on the beginning side of a 3 day weekend and thinking that I desperately need to get out of town. If I stay home all 3 nights, I might be crazy by Monday. Thanks B & K for trying to influence me to POAS but I don't know if I can do that either. I'm scared to. It's only 11 dpo. Or around that anyways. Oh and one other thing. You know all those e-mails that get circled round, the chain letter types that say you MUST send this on in _____ amount of time. Usually they are moderately annoying. I'm one who usually deletes them as I don't forward many e-mails since I don't know who likes to get what as far as e-mail. So as usually I get one or two of these a week. The last week they are making me freaking crazy. I don't have 15 people to send the damn things on to (that was todays and apparently someone who just deleted it soon after learned her fiance died and another person died herself) and I do NOT need bad luck at all right now. I need good luck, lucky rabbits feet, the stars to be aligned and whatever else could possibly work things in my favor. It just about makes me nuts to delete the things but I don't know what else to do with them. See, TTC makes you superstitious.