Finally Friday!!!

And I'm off work for the next 5 nights!!! Yay!! Of course it's hotter than hell here. It's been about a 100 the last couple of days. I have lots to do inside though.

Scout is doing a little bit better I think. She is actually sitting in the window sill in the sun right now, which is basically right next to me. But I'm ignoring her which seems to make her happier. She has finally been eating which is good. I'm hoping that the rescue lady can take her today and that she won't look like a wild animal. Right now the progress is directly related to her being segregated from the other animals completely and from me mostly leaving her alone. She still spends the majority of her time under the shelf.

I have a dentist appointment in a couple of hours. Oh goody.

Then I need to go to Target or Home Depot. I came up with an idea for Mrs. Dovie. She was again trying to build her nest on my ceiling fan blade on the porch this week as there is a bunch more of the twigs and stuff scattered around. Plus I saw her sitting up there several times. I have a place where I could put a bird house but I don't think she'd do the bird house. So I'm going to try to find a cheap hanging pot thing, put some of that moss stuff in it and hang it up for her where it's away from the porch a bit but where she can happily make her nest. Hopefully that will work out well for everyone.

Yesterday and today I took the dog and cats for a walk. It's so funny to be walking down the road and see someone in a car driving by do a total double take when they realize I'm pushing a stroller full of cats down the road. The cats of course still love it. They hardly make a sound the entire ride and are so busy looking around at everything. It's very cute.

Poor Scout

Ok so this poor kitty is so absolutely traumatized by everything here. I am so annoyed with myself for agreeing to take her after I had said no numerous times. Damn it. She actually bit me last night. I had looked into Bengal rescues and found that they weren't taking any more cats because of lack of foster homes. I put an ad on Craigslist thinking maybe I could find a better fit for her. The person who came to look at her saw her growling and hissing and her bite me and pretty much just left again. I don't blame her, I would have done the same thing. I don't know how much of this is a breed thing and how much it's related to past treatment she's received. The guy who talked me into this had said she was aloof and not very social with him but liked his cat well. I saw her interacting with the cat but almost no interaction with either of us. I figured a cat was a cat was a cat. I'm good at cats. I don't know if this is mostly a breed thing or what but she pretty much acts like a ferral cat. She growls, hisses and bares her teeth when I try to touch her. I received one e-mail from someone stating that she was a breeder for bengal cats and that it can often take a month or more for them to adjust and they tend to not be very social. I had gotten several calls of the craigslist ad but the most promising one was from a woman who does a dog rescue but is also familiar with bengals and she stated that she can take her and will be able to find a placement for her. I hope this works out for both me and for poor Scout. Right now truly isn't working and I just don't know what else to do.

Oh and thank you Kristen for the tip for getting the cat pee smell out of my bed. I'll have to try that.

I Think I Liked Her Better Lost

This is where I have some not very generous feelings towards the new cat in the house. I feel a little bit bad for voicing these but also feel the need to get them out and so you oh lucky internets get to hear about it.

Last night Scout peed on my bed. All the way through the bedding on to the mattress. I'm so not impressed. I had finally gotten Sara to pretty much quit peeing around my house (by moving into a house with absolutely no carpet) and now I'm worried that she will smell the pee on the bed and also decide to pee there. Why do cats decide to pee on a bed? Why not just go on the floor. I know that it wasn't that she was "mad at me" it's that she's scared and stressed but I'm still really upset by this. I am a lot more angry at this than I was with Sara peeing in the house for the most part. The difference though with Sara and Scout is that I'm attached to Sara and therefore more willing to put up with annoying behavior. I'm not attached to Scout. I feel bad for her but am not attached. I'm annoyed that I'm having to keep my bedroom door closed as I now don't want her hanging out under my bed, and my cats can't get in.

From what I was told her first owners hadn't treated her very well. She was left in a cage for a long time with only another cat and very little human interaction. She was described to me as aloof. I know right now she is stressed but every time I try to touch her she hisses and growls at me and acts like she's going to bite me. This is less amusing on day 3 than it was on day 1. I'm also feeling a bit resentful as I had been thinking about wanting another dog (I really want a chihuahua) and going back and forth on that but I didn't want another cat. And yet I let myself get talked into it because I'm too much of a softie. I don't want to take her to the shelter. They are overwhelmed by too many cats as it is now and I doubt she would get adopted. I hate the idea of her ending up there. But I just am really questioning whether she will fit in here. I know it's only been a few days but with cats I've had in the past this behavior has only lasted a day or so before they were back out seeking company. This cat doesn't seem to want company at all from humans and is totally traumatized by my cats and dog. My cats don't even hiss at her. They just look at her like she's crazy.

I looked around online yesterday and I found a Bengal rescue group here in California but they aren't taking any cats at this time because they don't have enough foster homes for them.

Ugg I hate it when I let myself get talked into doing something that I knew I really didn't want to do!

I Found Her

Or I guess I could say that she was no longer hiding under the bed. She must have come out when I was trying (mostly unsuccessfully) to take a nap. I had went outside with Sadie for a few minutes and when I walked back in I noticed her sitting there. I think she was hoping I wouldn't notice her. I hurried and got my camera. She still growls at me if I try to pet her. I'm hoping that ends soon. Poor thing just seems so overwhelmed by the whole business. Notice she really doesn't look very happy to have been found.

I also took a pic of my new dining set that I paid less than $100 for.

Tuesday Ramblings

So the annual trip to the hooha doctor complete with vajay-jay check is now complete. I saw the nurse practitioner and I liked her. I was a little put off at first when I was asked to sign a form that stated they checked for various STD's and if my insurance refused to pay I would have to. My reasoning is that I have absolutely no risk factors (we won't even discuss how long it's been since I've had sex) and I won't pay for them. She said that was fine she wouldn't order them. I also asked her about doing the labs from the RE's list for various clotting problems. She said she didn't have a problem with that, she coded it as recurrent pregnancy loss which is a bit of a stretch but sort of true. They weren't clinically recognized pregnancies but there have been 3. So then I went to the lab and got my blood work done. Oh and I have a CD3 FSH to do with my next cycle. I will be interested to see what that result is even though I suppose it doesn't really matter much if I have no intention of using my own eggs.

Pics of Scout (the new kitty) will have to wait until she actually comes out from under the bed. I haven't actually seen her since yesterday afternoon. Yesterday I sort of closed her off in the second bedroom to decrease stimulation etc for her and to keep the other animals away from her. This morning she was under a shelf I have in the room. She came out hissing at the cats. Then I took Sadie and the girls for a walk with the pet stroller and when we got back Scout was no longer under the shelf and I haven't seen her since. I've heard her, hissing at the cats and the dog. As far as I know she's under the bed. Poor thing.

Oh and once I get my table set up I'll take pictures of it too. I got a great oak dining table with 4 chairs for $95. I was so excited.

News And Stuff

It was such a long work week. And I am so tired. Yet still awake at 2:30 in the afternoon when I've been up almost 24 hours. I think I'll likely go to bed soon. The week was once again filled with a ton of work drama. I'm trying to ignore it to the best of my ability.

I inherited a new four legged baby today. Well she's not really a baby, she's a 4 year old cat. A friend who was a travel nurse and is moving elsewhere needed to find a home for his cat and he asked me to take her. I said I would give it a try and see if she can adjust and if everyone can get along ok. If not he understands that I will then work on getting her a good home. Right now the poor things is huddled under my desk trying her best to hide from me and the dog and Sara and Luna. Poor thing seems totally traumatized. I'm hoping she starts to at least adjust to them. I feel really bad for her right now. Of course the other furbabies are absolutely enthralled by her. Except Sadie is also a little afraid of her. But they all want to stand around and look at her.

I have another appt with the doctor this week. Let's hope AF doesn't decide to show up again. I don't think it's possible but I didn't think it was possible last week either.

I also find myself craving change. I feel like I want to do some changes around here. I'm not totally sure what and if I will either. Just a thought bouncing around my head with all the others. Maybe if I went to bed I wouldn't be so damn scattered.

Show And Tell

Well I may be early to class today. I may even be sitting here all by myself I haven't looked around yet. But if I don't do this now, before I go to bed I likely won't do it tonight before I go to work. And I just had to share. Updated to ad that not only was I way early but I forgot my homework and I have the wrong stuff. Oops.
I've been trying to stop at the Farmer's Market here on Saturday mornings. There is a pretty good one and I love all the fresh produce. Unfortunately a few weeks back when the whole place was in bloom with flowers too I forgot my camera. Today though I took a couple of pictures of my finds when I got home.
Here are some strawberries I got. They are so sweet and juicy. Much better than what I usually manage to find at the super market. Also what I'm having for my breakfast right now.

This is a pic of all of my yummy goodies. I got some blueberries, strawberries, cherries, nectarines, cucumbers, zucchini and yellow squash, green beans and some raw milk.

I saw someone else this last week talking about raw milk on their blog and I had commented that I had tried raw butter and really wasn't that impressed by it. Today though they were sampling the raw milk and it was awesome. Price is higher but not horrible for just myself. It's only about a dollar more than what I pay for organic milk at the grocery store. I usually only go through a half gallon a week or so. I'm trying to buy more fresh and organic produce not to mention the local stuff. It is more expensive but it's also really yummy. Of course all the fruit is going to insure that there is no possibility for constipation around here.

To she what everyone else is showing head on over to Stirrup-Queens and join in the fun!

Excess Meds

So I got to looking at the Lupron in my fridge and realized that the chances of me using it before expiration were slim to none (more like none based on the expiration date) and that maybe I should look into finding it a home. I have 2 partial bottles of Lupron which depending on your dose may be enough to get someone through a cycle. One expires 6/09 (soon) and the other 8/09. I would be happy to send these on to someone who was going to be cycling soon and needed the Lupron. Just e-mail me and let me know, battynurse at gmail. I also have syringes coming out of my ears so if you needed those I could send them too.

My Body Is Making Me Crazy

Yes, it is. Totally nuts. So I mentioned last week that my cycles have been wonky since my IVF last November. Someone I think Kristen? Pointed out that once in a while ovulation can happen at odd times or something to that effect. It got me thinking that maybe the CM that showed up right after my period a couple weeks ago was actually pre-ovulation CM and that the cramping I had at work that one night may have been ovulation. I was right. Cause guess who showed up today a mere 17 days after her last arrival? Yup. AF. Bitch. Cause once a month isn't bad enough. And wouldn't you figure I have a gyn appointment on Tuesday. What I am sort of thinking now though is that maybe I didn't ovulate last month since I don't remember ever having the CM show up. So my period seems to have happened sort of on it's own. Then again, 11 days after ovulation which is a short luteal phase for me. I think that maybe this is my bodies way of saying I'm getting older. It does make me more comfortable with my decision to not cycle again with my own eggs. It would be interesting to know what my FSH is right now though. Maybe I'll ask the doc to check it.
Which means that donor eggs or donor embryos it will be. For sure. Funny thing is that as of right now this doesn't bother me. I don't really care about the genetic link as much as I care about having a newborn. I want to experience that. All of it. The part that I still have a hard time with is the idea of the cost involved with donor eggs and how long I'll have to save to go that route. I haven't looked in to other countries much yet and will down the road some but it still feels overwhelming. For the donor embryos I mentioned that I had my name put on the list at my doctors office. Many of the other offices I checked in to that have donor embryo lists want you to be a patient which means booking an appointment, traveling to wherever the clinic is and paying a fairly large consult fee to get on the list. I'm not really jumping on that one yet as it seems like it could get pretty expensive. I found one place that seems to be a forum where you can register and try to meet others who either have or are looking for donor embryos. I'm still thinking about that one but again there is a cost associated with it and while it's only a one time cost and not super high ($100) I still haven't decided if I want to sign up. I've had someone ask about whether I'd be interested in donor embryos with an open or semi open relationship. I hadn't thought of it a lot but I would consider that too. I don't know how likely it is. I think it would depend on the getting to know process. I don't quite know how that would go. Still, I'm willing to consider it. From one stand point having an open relationship of any sort would be able to provide information to any children at a later date even if it didn't mean extended family. I guess it's a wait and see thing. Who knows. I suppose anything's possible.
As far as my healthy activities go? I did 7 minutes on Friday night and again on Saturday night. Right now my back muscles especially right between my shoulder blades are sore. I'll give it another go again tonight. Next goal is 10 minutes. I can do it. I just hope some of the muscle soreness afterwards starts to get better soon.
Ok I have a problem too. I got a new lap top a couple weeks ago and have finally just gotten everything switched over to it. Well somewhere on the screen or on the key pad or something I keep hitting something that is shrinking my text on the screen. It's affecting mostly g-mail but is affecting everything else too. I can't hardly read my e-mail. Oh and the dumb thing downloaded IE 8 last night and now that's making things weird too. If anyone knows how to enlarge my text and or to quit making it smaller (I've tried the page tab at the top) could you please let me know? I hate it when I can't figure out what I did. Never mind. I figured out how to make it normal size again. Still not sure how I shrunk it in the first place but it's back to normal.

Show And Tell

So for this weeks show and tell I have a couple pictures of something that left me very torn this past week.

See my friend...

Mrs. Dove...

Returned.

And I couldn't decide if I was enchanted by her choice of location...

Or annoyed since her choice of location included me not being able to water my flowers until she was done with the next round of babies. Since that would mean certain death to my flowers I opted to break out the camera and get some pics before I gently scared her away.

Of course for reasons I'm not entirely clear on she seems to like my back yard (cause it's so like able there with a dog that barks at her when she tries to land) she has continued to look for an ideal spot for her nest. She hasn't tried my flowers again but the other night I walked out on my porch to discover a large amount of dried grass scattered around. It took me noticing her sitting on top of the ceiling fan blade and a couple pieces of tiny eggs splattered on the porch also (yes, sadie was trying to eat it) to realize that she was attempting to build a nest on the ceiling fan blade and it fell. Poor mama dove. But please stay out of my flowers.

To see what the rest of the class is showing head on over to Stirrup-Queens and join in the fun.

It's My Friday!!

So glad it's my Friday. What a week. On Monday I did that sleep study thing. It was sort of odd. I did it with the CPAP machine and I had a mask on my nose that blows air in constantly. Every time I opened my mouth air came out and I felt like a fish. Hard to explain but it was sort of funny. I thought that I felt more awake and alert on Tuesday but also thought that maybe I was thinking I felt better because I wanted to feel better. But then on Wednesday I was so tired again. So I think it really did make a difference. I'm sort of excited about this. They did tell me it would take a couple of weeks before I got a cpap machine.
I've been trying to work out on the elliptical. Yup 2 minutes the first day. I'm hoping to get myself up to at least 5 on my days off. Which is funny because I can hop on a treadmill and walk for half an hour without difficulty.
It's supposed to be seriously hot here this weekend. Like over a hundred hot. I think I'll be hanging out inside. Even though strangely I seem to be acclimating to the weather here. I've noticed that being outside in the 90's doesn't bother me unless I'm in direct sunlight. Good time to work on cleaning the house up and trying get rid of some stuff. I need to go through my second bedroom and get rid of stuff. Also get all my files transferred off my old computer onto my new computer and hopefully get a wifi connection hooked up in my house so I can use the new computer wherever. I also need to clean out the inside of my car since yesterday I managed to spill part of my soda all over the drivers door and me on my way to work yesterday. Otherwise not much planned. Just taking it easy for a few days.
I got some pictures the other day that were pretty cool that I'll have to post as soon as I find my cord that connects the camera to the computer. Oh and I went and bought some herbs (and will get a few more) and have planted those in pots now on my patio. My patio is starting to be pretty full of flowers and such in pots. My tomato plants have tomatoes on them.
Oh and the last couple of days at work have been so pleasant without either of they bullies being here. Makes for such a nice night.
Updated: Slow makes for a longer night but I've had time to read. I just finished reading a great book. It's called "The Sugar Queen" and it's by the same author who wrote "Garden Spells" which was also fantastic. I loved it. Such a fun book. Now I'm blog surfing and looking at blogs I don't usually read cause I've still got 2 hours left and nothing to do.

Monday Monday

Another work week bites the dust. Thank goodness. It's been busier the last few nights. I guess because it's warmer and all the dingbats go out, get drunk and or high and get stupid. And boy has there been some serious stupid. I suppose it makes life interesting. Work has become a constant state of turmoil and drama. Everyone is constantly complaining about everyone else. We have two charge nurses who are essentially both bullies. I suppose it's good that for the most part they don't like each other much and aren't bullying the same people. One is pretty open and up front about it and the other is a lot more passive aggressive about it but the results are the same. I usually work with the passive aggressive one (the same one who has made comments about my weight, my lack of what she thinks is an interesting life etc) and while I have gotten better about ignoring her frequent disparaging comments about plus size people and have therefore been able to work with her mostly peacefully, I am still really bothered by watching her bully others. And it happens daily. She has apparently also remarked on other peoples weight that we work with and told a patient that he was fat. I'm at the point where I just don't know what to do any more. If I keep quiet I can probably exist mostly peacefully with her but it bugs me a lot that she treats others so badly. If I step up and say something to her or the manager then she will of course make my life difficult too along with almost everyone else.
Not too much else happening right now I suppose. A couple of weeks ago I did a sleep study test to check for sleep apnea. It looks like it came back that I do in fact have sleep apnea because tonight I'm going back for the second part of the test with the CPAP machine. I'm actually maybe happy about this? Not happy that I have sleep apnea but happy that maybe if we start treating it I will start feeling better and have more energy and maybe even exercise more. With that in mind I found an elliptical on Cra*igs*list yesterday. It's a G0lds Gym one and I got it for a pretty good price. And the really funny thing? I actually also got it to fit in the back of my car. Yup folks, you can fit an elliptical in the back of a Sub*aru F0rrester (without taking it apart). Now all I have to do is really work at getting myself going. Cause right now? I can make it about 3 minutes before I feel like I'm going to totally freaking die. Maybe I can make it 5 by the end of the week???
Oh and I don't know what's happened but it seems that since my last IVF try my cycle has went to hell in a hand basket. I have always had a regular 28 day cycle. Sometimes even a totally freaking annoying cycle that lasted 28 days even though it really should have lasted longer thanks to meds. So I was a bit surprised by the first cycle after that lasted like 41 days. The next month I was back to close to normal at 30 days. The month after that? Back to weird ville and 40 days. This last month was another 30 day cycle. However right after AF left (about 3 days) all of the sudden I had tons of CM. Like fertile CM. Like EWCM. And then I had a day of this weird cramping that felt almost like tenderness around ovulation that lasted about 24 hours and then disappeared completely taking all the CM with it. I find myself wondering if ovulation is sort of may occurring or trying to occur totally separate from my period. Is that even freaking possible?? I can't figure it out at all. Notice of course that even though there is pretty much no hope of cycling any time soon I'm still keeping track of all that stuff. I wonder if that will ever quit.
D is doing pretty good. Still adjusting and when I talk to him he's bored. All that time on his hands not going to work and all. I'm trying to convince him to come down here for a few days. Where the weather is nice :). It's been high 80's here all week which is very nice.
So that's life in my little corner of the world. I'm off for 2 nights now and I plan to relax as much as possible and maybe clean a little bit. Or maybe not.

Tired

Well I made it back from Spokane yesterday. I had a good trip home and it was good to get to spend some time with D and hopefully I was a bit of a help. I can't say I really did much while I was there although I did participate in a little retail therapy. I got some new summer clothes which was fun. D seems to be doing pretty good. It's all a big adjustment but he is so far dealing with it fairly well. Right now I'm trying to talk him into coming down here to visit for a few days. We'll see. I think he will be off work for 6 weeks so he should have time. The animals seemed to have fared pretty well while I was gone. All was well when I got home anyway. I came home Sunday and had to transfer planes in Seattle. My friend R was supposed to be going to LA this week for work so she arranged it to fly on the same flight with me back to Fresno on Sunday. Then we drove to LA. It was a short visit but I enjoyed it a lot and really needed the time with her. She can always make me feel better by talking things out with her. We took the long way there and so she got to see my favorite beach (pismo) and Santa Barbara etc. It was a nice drive. When we stopped at the beach we saw a thing in the parking lot that was the freakiest thing I think I've ever seen. It looked like a giant mutant ant. Someone told us it was a potato bug and when we looked it up that was correct. Dang it was nasty. Of course we had to take pictures of it. They didn't turn out very good but you can go here and see what they look like. Then we stayed at one of the Sher*aton hotels in LA. I am so impressed. We were having a bit of a difficult time finding a place that would allow Sadie since she's not really a small dog. One place charge a $150. 00 fee. We called the Sher*aton and they stated they had no pet fee but you would be charged if there was any damage. Sadie went with us no problems at all. The room was super nice, the beds really comfy. I loved it. Then today I took R to get her rental car so she could go to work and I came home so I could get some stuff done before I have to go back to work tomorrow. I'm so behind on so much. I had 88 posts in my reader and am now down to 63. Hopefully I'll catch up this week. I have probably 30 some hours worth of shows on my DVR. And enough laundry to just keep me up most of the night. So I better get started.