I Wish It Were Catching

After work this morning I went out to breakfast with some of the people from surgery. There is a group that works Sun, Mon, Tues every week and on Wed morning they all go out for breakfast. I don't often get to go since it doesn't work with my schedule but this week it did. So one of the girls that works in surgery is pregnant and she was there. Then the daughter of another woman got there, with her two week old baby girl. Then a second pregnant lady showed up. Yes at this point I was feeling a bit overwhelmed by all of this. It doesn't usually bother me to be around babies or pregnant people but once in a while it gets overwhelming. Of course one person said something about it being catching. I wish, if that were the case I would have been at the other end of the table trying to freaking catch something. Another said something about just going to the sperm bank and getting some. Yes, been there, done that. I do wish I could still afford to do that every month even if I can't afford IVF again but at $500 per vial it's a bit out of my price range to try monthly. Then I also got to thinking about how if the last IVF had worked, I'd probably have a new born. Instead I was sitting at the other end of the table looking at someone elses baby and wanting to hold it so bad but knowing that since I didn't know mom (or grandma) at all and that I'm still coughing I really shouldn't, wondering if I ever will have that.

As far as work goes, I still don't know much. I finally sent off another e-mail last night asking if they had a time frame for me. I know they have me on the schedule until mid September (ugg) but I also heard through the grapevine that they may have found my replacement. In the meantime, the job I'm supposed to be going to is still listed as available online.